This is how it is…..

it has been a working day today and yesterday.Felt involved in what is happening around and was doing what i like.

Sometimes i think if u miss that liking, u get distracted. I am more of a writer and right now i want to involved in that stage and the whole film making. However the doubts pop up in my mind.Like today, “was it this that i came in for” or “is this going to bring in positive thoughts” and many more.The reason is that i feel useless wen i am not actively working like all of us do.I am more the kind who tells someone what i think.However,as I mentioned in the earlier post it is getting way too difficult to judge the exact situation.May be it is too early to think of all this.Maybe the earlier movie gave me free hand and i was involved actively in everything.It is happening here,no one sez u stop that,u are not fit for it.But that inhibition that “oh should i talk now and give my opinion” is running in my head constantly.I hope i get over it or do something.

Apart from that few things and talking to few friends brought my thought process about life back to where it was.Spoke to A Bhai,who is like my elder bro and he did listen me out.That is what i was looking for someone to hear me out.Like a sounding board…..

Life is getting too upside down at home…hope it does not stay stagnant like that…

My day at work

son turned 4 yesterday.had a great time with him and his friends and family.
back to work today and feel like i have to get going fast or i will die out of thoughts.

One of the main things about the film industry is that you got to have lot of patience.I am not the person who has immense talent to handle that.I have been working on a movie and for now i have nothing firm to do.The thing here as one of my friends mentioned is that “you have not one job,but loads of things to do in a movie”.It is not like a desk job,it is a job that involves in thinking on feet are not that sore yet and that is why i keep running around instead of thinking at one point.

I am right now sitting with the producer the main Ad’s and i want to speak up.However I keep thinking,should i or not? reason for that I want to still wait and learn.Wait for the right opportunity said my brain and that is what I am doing.When is the right time to speak up I ask myself again and it sez now.I know it is contradictory to what I said in this same paragraph.

That is how my mind is working right now too confused and full of shit……..

THe Story BeIGns

been here in the production office for the past 1 week.I am excited about the project.The main thing about accepting a project has got a lot to do with the script and the unit for me.

So when i walked in I was greeted by a friendly yet firm crew members.The thing about me is that i am plain honest and do not like the mediocre running around the trees shit.

been taking care of few things.I am not yet sure on the act though.however being a part of this crew seems to give me hope that there are people who respect cinema.

that i think counts much at the end of the day.


the past week has been a rollacoster ride for my ego……….I always thought that i would get everything that i want. I went for interviews during my corporate phase and got jobs after one hard work but a lot of right attitude.However things seems to be different in the present field.I finished working on one movie.I got it all right. DOne with it the crew out and the director is out of country.

Was on a break for a month and then i thought all i had to do is walk in and get the job. No boy no it is not that easy. Here is the part of the creative industry, you got be creative in your approach. I learned that after meeting few directors. However I did decide that when i am in a position to recruit the crew, I would push everything that i learnt aside and start a new trend.I would make an attempt to call them and let them know the results ASAP, Cause waiting for the next project is tough and waiting for a call is tougher. your ego keeps slidign down and you look at phone and walk around with it like the last survivor on earth………


I am fast asleep,deep in slumber and not dreaming a bit. i was nudged first and then scratched and then yelled upon.I get up walk my way out and open the door.Look at the wall clock and the time sez”it is that time of the night where world sleeps”. Was dam angry and wanted to get back into my cozy bed,however when i looked out saw her jumping and attacking the soft toy and wanting me to attack it did i as told…

Saki girl is the new addition to our family.She is a cutie litthle,lab pup.I was waiting to get my sonny boy a friend for his 4th birthday.I was thinking how to budget the same.Then came a phone call asking me if I can pick up Saki for the owner who is my friend Arun bought this dog for her daughter and now they had some issues with the dog (not personal). So voila it was god’s ways of telling me go go girl pick up the little joy.

I jumped in the car and drove to her and Chechi sat with her in the car while we drove her back home.

She is nearly settled and is sleeping near me feet ( cannot move them)….pissed a million times,shat 10 times and the house smelles like we have SAKI…………………..

Huppy and Syad…

the thing about life is that it seems bad and worse in a second and after a second it is full of joy and fun…i am going through that phase….one minute this and one minute that. few sad and few fun situations

1.son eat a whole slice of pizza– ha ha if u thinking why this was fun,try and make a 3 year old eat a pizza without dropping..try buddy try… news that my bro is trying to communicate with me – it is hard when he is nto alive and i am lloking for a mediator to talk to him

3.kishore made my day,he makes it everyday – but what better then hearing him say how mauch he loves me..yeah yeah i am smiling here…

4.amma walked into the room and fainted and cursed me – cause for this faintness…my room was smelling like ciggi company

5.smits was feeling low in life and i felt bad looking at her shed tears – never want that woman to cry ever…i am there for you love..we are all there for you…

6. brought in my birthaday with special few – i loves it ya i loved it…