Amma is here :D

MOTHER/AMMA/AMME/MOM/MUMMY/AMMI – the most potent word in any language,the word can melt you down,make you shiver,make you do things that you never did,make you think and make you cry and make you love again with joy.

but here is what it is,when they come to visit us(yes,i means the mothers) they will not give you any notification(like the one that pops on you webpage).they will visit and go as they pleaseexcuseme.

the curry that they make will take away all your depression.but,the lecture that they will give you while you are eating that curry,will being in more :/.

yes,ya my mother is here šŸ˜€

1.She is the best-est of the best,she will make you wear the best,that means i need to get all my new clothes in and all the comfortable payjammies go puchuk into the old bin šŸ˜¦

2.she will shop for me till i say “ENOUGH AYE AMME ENOUGH”.She will make sure i buy clothes,furniture,food that lasts at least 20 years šŸ™‚ šŸ˜¦

3.she will make me healthy.She will sit in front of me while i am eating and say “you should get your stomach checked,looks like it is bloating too much” and then go “you want some more of that butter and potato kanna?”

4.she is my rock and my diamond,she teaches me how to live with men,”if some man teases you, or bullies you or misbehaves with you,cut of that cock” she says in plain words.

5.she will say “let us go for a walk child” then she will walk and stop at every junction and talk to her auntie friends and go “yes yes,my deethi is lovely,oh,you too noticed her chest,i bought one number less size bra for her” and smile and go :/ (really!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

6.she will call my father and say “bring that prasadam we got for deethi when you coming” (she must have got is 6 months ago) when i protest she says “it is god’s,it will never go out of fashion”

7.she is my lioness,she protects her cubs with fierce and shrewd determination and loves us like a motherlovesherchild(duh).but,let’s us go out and test the waters and if it is hot,she will tell us only once we dip our hand in.

8.she wants me to buyahouse NOW,when i say “amme,my husbands salary is not that big”she says “take me to his boss i say” (i wish i Could,only once and then myhusbandssalary will go HIGH)

9.she loves to talk to me,when i am eating,sleeping,drinking,in the loo,in the loo again.

10.she tells me “i do not have another birth,this is my last,that is why god made me your mother” (go figure deethi,go figure)

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what married people?

my husband and i are very lovely people and we love all those people who are lovely to us.But(yesthereisalwaysabut) when it comes to few things we are like most husbands and wives all over the globe! and here is why……

1.we wait to see who will get up first and if one does get up before the other, it is always “baby,i got up 2 hours ago”(even if i got up about half a second before him)
2.we try and argue for the most part of the day and sleep it off or and continue the next day.
3.i,me is never wrong and the other person(his or mine) ego is bigger than the big bang
4.we wait for the kids to hit the bed,so that we can crawl in the bed,get under covers and …..snore away.
5.and yes,we always agree in front of the kids,1 out of 100 times!
6.we try and make sure we save money every month and then spend it on the the same month and go…ayaaaaaa what to do now?
7.we want to take a break,go on a vacation (to kalasipalaya,to a seedy hotel with lots of noise and sleep for 16 hours)
8.we want our kids to grow today,tomorrow morning we want them to be 21 years old(what bliss that will be)
9.we have 2 soaps in the bathroom for bathing and the man always ends up using the wife’s soap and yes,sometimes the oh so expensive one lasts one week in his hands!
10.we will say the truth with courage,even if it is wrong and then look up for a lawyers number asap!

more are coming,you just wait ya!

when one runs!

One day a girl and her girl friend ran away from home.They went to a supermarket and ate all the cakes and drank all the juices and said thank you to the owner and walked away.the owner smiled at them and said bye bye babies.(they have no clue that they had to pay and he though they were with adults who will pay later)

Then they went to another shop and asked that uncle if they can sit here and watch the traffic.that uncle said yes and after an hour,he got three other kids from somewhere.they all played and ate and then went through the back door to another land.where there was a big house with lots of tress and a beautiful house.the auntie there gave the girls a bath and while telling them a bed time story asked the girls to tell a story about their parents.the girls did and then went off to sleep.

in the morning,the girls woke up and promptly ran intoĀ theirĀ parents arms.the excited parents gave a slap or two and then the parents took auntie and uncle andĀ theirĀ kids and us and themselves to zoo.

that night the girls slept inĀ theirĀ own houses and never ever got to know the name of those wonderful people whoĀ shelteredĀ them and protected them.

Ā 

I wonder where they are,as every time i pass that colony(vikrampuri in secunderabad, circa -1987) Ā and Ā try desperately to look for the house and cannot remember the street.But,where you are,you were my firstĀ guardianĀ angels on earth šŸ™‚

Ā 

What the Numer 1 does!

I have a 8 year old son and managing them(son’s) is not so easy.I bow to the mothers who have taken care of more then 2 sons and will frame their photos and put them on aĀ pedestalĀ till the time i kick the bucket.

Ā 

Here are few things my Elder 1 is famous for and makes me want to tear his hair and then trim mine!

  1. walking talkingĀ enquirer
  2. does not give a rat’s ass if the bus is waiting for him (his going to latin(number 2) is important)
  3. tells you while going to number 2 at 8 am in the morning,that he has an exam today.
  4. eats something that you really put in effort and shouts 1001 times “it is salty,salty,salty,salty….…and salty” (makes me want to dump him in the same salty curry.
  5. waits for me to hit the bed,cozy up in my blanket and then goes “deethi,i want to eat,i am hungry” (about 11pm in the night)
  6. waits for his little brother to sleep and then starts to record his voice on my phone and plays it over and over (the sound goes something like – OOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAEEEEEEEE)
  7. makes sure all his rough books are roughly used withing 2.5 seconds of me getting them from the shop.
  8. cries at the drop of a hat and makes me feel guilty like forever.
  9. tells me “i want to open a hotel,when i become big and then promptly tell me “you will be my assistant,cook,washer and drier”
  10. looks at me and says “deethi,i think no one wanted me in heaven,so god send me to you and then made you and me happy” (add’s he would have chosen me second and ben tens thatha first)

Yes,it might look(very easily) like he is a brat.But the funny thing is he manages to make me fall in love with him and so does the I’s šŸ˜›